Clarity

During the grief process you experience several different phases. One of those phases is asking why. You start to question everything. Not just question the events of what happened by everything in your life. Am I doing it right? Am I doing it wrong? What difference have I made? For me its been where am I headed? What is the meaning or purpose? Maybe that's because my mom ALWAYS said, "Everything happens for a reason." Although I'm more inclined to think it is because in my journey I am trying to live for the purpose of God and his Kingdom. Surely God wouldn't put me through this pain without a purpose. You know, I knew in the beginning of my grief journey that no matter what it would be painful. No matter how much I pray to God to take away my pain, it is going to hurt. It still does daily. I don't pray for God to do anything but be there with me. To help me get through the pain. But I also pray that I get to see the purpose. I pray I get to make a difference to someone. It is in helping others I find healing and purpose. I'll just keep praying and moving forward.

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